Ask the kids why snowmen don't go to a new year's party (they want to chill out!) or what a ghost says on new year's (happy boo year).Looking for some laughs to celebrate the new year?
Here are the best twitter jokes about the presidential debate last night.Maybe i won't stick to this one either.Today's free joke of the day | lol with tag24 and get your daily dose of hilarious and fun puns.
May 1, 2024, 5:25 pm utc(andrew milligan/ap) london — britain's parliament is known to many as the.
Last night's debate was the first presidential debate of 2024 between president joe biden and former president donald.Time flies like an arrow.22, 2024, 9:01 pm utc / updated june 5, 2024, 7:21 pm utc by sarah lemire
My new year's resolution was to stay out of shape.Fruit flies like a banana.
In times like those, it helps to have a few good office jokes up your.Celebrate the new year 2024 with laughter and wit with these funny messages, wishes, and quotes.Enjoy 110 seriously funny jokes to tell your friends and family, from dad jokes to airport jokes.
We curated a list of hilarious new year's jokes, so that you can start your year off with some giggles and grins.There are a lot of things you can do for good luck on.
Last update images today Funny Jokes
Pirates Place Hard-throwing Rookie Jones On IL
The 2023-24 season is over with the battles for the major honours, European qualification, relegation and promotion settled.
Here's a roundup of what was decided, and what's still at stake, in the English Premier League, German Bundesliga, Spanish LaLiga, Italian Serie A and French Ligue 1.
- Stream on ESPN+: LaLiga, Bundesliga, more (U.S.)
Premier League Season completed TitleManchester City were crowned champions for a record-setting fourth consecutive season.
Champions League (4)CONFIRMED
1. Man City (38 games, 91 points) 2. Arsenal (38, 89) 3. Liverpool (38, 82) 4. Aston Villa (38, 68) Europa League (2)Man United beat 2-0 Man City in the FA Cup final (stream a replay on ESPN+, U.S. only) to seal one spot in the Europa League (UEL). The second went to fifth place.
CONFIRMED
FA Cup: Manchester United 5. Tottenham Hotspur (38, 66) Europa Conference League (1)CONFIRMED
6. Chelsea (38, 63) Relegation (3)RELEGATED
18. Luton Town (38, 26) 19. Burnley (38, 24) 20. Sheffield United (38, 16)Leicester City and Ipswich Town have been automatically promoted to the Premier League. Southampton beat Leeds United 1-0 in the Championship playoff final (stream a replay on ESPN+, U.S. only) to take the final spot.
LaLiga Season completed Title Real Madrid have been crowned champions.- Stream all LaLiga games live on ESPN+ (US only)
Champions League (4)CONFIRMED
1. Real Madrid (38, 95) 2. Barcelona (38, 85) 3. Girona (38, 81) 4. Atlético Madrid (38, 76) Europa League (2)Athletic won the Copa del Rey and will be in the Europa League, though they will also finish in the first Europa League place in fifth. That means the other UEL place goes to sixth, which Real Sociedad have claimed.
CONFIRMED
5. Athletic Club (38, 68) 6. Real Sociedad (38, 60) Europa Conference League (1)Real Betis cannot be overtaken for the final European place.
CONFIRMED
7. Real Betis (38, 57) Relegation (3)CONFIRMED
18. Cádiz (38, 33) 19. Almería (38, 21) 20. Granada (38, 21)Leganes and Real Valladolid have been promoted into the top flight. Espanyol won the promotion playoffs.
Bundesliga Season completed Title Bayer Leverkusen won the first championship in their history with a remarkable unbeaten record.- Stream all Bundesliga games live on ESPN+ (US only)
Champions League (5)The Bundesliga has sealed an extra place through the European Performance Spot, which sends the team in fifth to the UCL too.
CONFIRMED
1. Bayer Leverkusen (34, 90) 2. VfB Stuttgart (34, 73) 3. Bayern Munich (34, 72) 4. RB Leipzig (34, 65) 5. Borussia Dortmund (34, 63) Europa League (2)Leverkusen beat second division side Kaiserslautern 1-0 in the final of the DFB Pokal (stream a replay on ESPN+, U.S. only), so both sixth and seventh get a UEL place.
CONFIRMED
6. Eintracht Frankfurt (34, 47) 7. TSG Hoffenheim (34, 46) Europa Conference League (1)CONFIRMED
8. Heidenheim (34, 42) Relegation (2+1)Two teams are relegated automatically, while third-bottom takes on third place in the 2. Bundesliga in a playoff.
RELEGATION PLAYOFF
16. VfL Bochum (34, 33)Bochum looked destined to be relegated after losing 3-0 at home to Fortuna Düsseldorf in the first leg ... only for Bochum to win the return leg 3-0 and then secure their top-flight status with a 6-5 penalty-shootout win.
RELEGATED
17. FC Cologne (34, 27) 18. SV Darmstadt 98 (34, 17)St. Pauli and Holstein Kiel have been automatically promoted into the Bundesliga.
Serie A Season completed Title Internazionale wrapped up the Scudetto as runaway champions. Champions League (5) Like Germany, Italy has secured an extra place in next year's competition through its clubs' performance in Europe this season, meaning five clubs have qualified.CONFIRMED
1. Internazionale (38, 94) 2. AC Milan (38, 75) 3. Juventus (38, 71) 4. Atalanta (38, 69) 5. Bologna (38, 68)As Atalanta will finish in the top 4, Italy will remain on five places in the Champions League. Had Atalanta finished fifth, then AS Roma in sixth would also have been in the Champions League next season.
Europa League (2)Juventus won the Coppa Italia, so sixth and seventh will qualify for the UEL.
CONFIRMED
6. AS Roma (38, 63) 7. Lazio (38, 61) Europa Conference League (1)CONFIRMED
8. Fiorentina (38, 60) Relegation (3)RELEGATED
18. Frosinone (38, 35) 19. Sassuolo (38, 30) 20. Salernitana (38, 17)Frosinone began the final day in 16th, but they lost to 17th-placed Udinese, and 18-th placed Empoli scored in the 93rd minute to climb out of the drop zone.
Parma and Cesc Fàbregas' Como were promoted to Serie A automatically, while Venezia beat Cremonese in the playoff final.
Ligue 1 Season completed Title Paris Saint-Germain secured the title with ease. Champions League (3+1)France gets three automatic places, with fourth place entering the UCL in the third qualifying round.
Remarkably Brest were in fourth when the games on the final day entered the 90th minute. Brest scored to go level with Lille on points and goal difference, but Lille stayed third on head to head. Then Lille conceded at home in the fourth minute of added time, sending Brest directly into the Champions League group stage.
CONFIRMED
1. Paris Saint-Germain (34, 76) 2. AS Monaco (34, 67) 3. Brest (34, 61) 4. Lille (34, 59) Europa League (2)The UEL places go to fifth and the winners of the Coupe de France -- PSG beat Lyon 2-1 in the final, so the places passes to sixth ... which is Lyon.
CONFIRMED
5. Nice (34, 55) 6. Lyon (34, 53) Europa Conference League (1)CONFIRMED
7. Lens (34, 51) Relegation (2+1)Two teams are relegated, with third-bottom facing a playoff with a team from the second division to remain in Ligue 1.
RELEGATION PLAYOFF
16. Metz (34, 29)Metz are relegated after they lost 4-3 on aggregate to Saint-Étienne.
RELEGATED
17. Lorient (34, 29) 18. Clermont Foot (34, 25)AJ Auxerre and Angers were automatically promoted to Ligue 1.
